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Knowing a Foodstamper
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Wednesday, August 14 @ 14:07:20 EDT (32246 reads)

youarelovedSOmuch writes "I work at a grocery store and see all kinds of people. What I have discovered is that while there may be thousands of different people, they generally all fit into just a handful of groups that are all very predictable, once you have gotten enough experience with them. One of these groups is what I call, "Foodstampers". About half the time, when a person is walking up to the checkstand, I can guess correctly that they are going to be on foodstamps. Some of the giveaways are a combination of the following attributes:

-They are covered in tattoos
-They are dressed in dirty, poor-looking clothes
-They are clearly exhibiting signs of someone on drugs
-They are overweight, rail-thin, missing teeth, half or unshaven, or otherwise look unhealthy
-They look like they haven't showered in a long time
-They are often young to middle aged (It's very rare to see someone 70+ years of age on foodstamps)
-They buy extremely unhealthy, packaged, food that people who make their own money would not buy in such large quantities (Example: a shopping cart full of little debbies, potato chips, bakery goods, and hamburger helper)
-They often seem to lack any gratitude for the fact that they are receiving their food for free
-Often have a "negative vibe" about them

I would say the majority, not all, foodstampers exhibit some combination of the above qualities.

(Read More... | 5190 bytes more | 865 comments | Score: 2.36)

The dealer is the bad guy?
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Thursday, August 08 @ 10:18:28 EDT (19425 reads)

Anonymous writes "Customer calls in on a used vehicle.  Customer asks what the condition of the undercarriage of said vehicle is like.  After laughing and telling them that I didn't know because, as a salesperson, I'm supposed to look presentable and clean and do not have the time to crawl under and inspect the condition of the undercarriage of every used Jeep, the customer explains that my 'attitude' was costing me the sale and that he'd never do business with me, interrupting me while I was trying to explain to him that I could have the Jeep put on a lift and that I'd be happy to get him pictures of the undercarriage.

After driving across town to pick up said vehicle, placing it on a lift, and text messaging the customer photographs of the vehicle, I further explained that I was doing the best I could to cover for a co-worker on vacation, doing 2 peoples' jobs at the same time, and that I took the time out to get him pictures of what he was interested in and that I was willing to go the extra mile to earn his business.  After the customer sneered about him not wanting me to get dirty, he goes on to tell me that he'd never do business with me ever.

Sounds good to me. 

(Read More... | 400 comments | Score: 3)

Plumbing stories
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Tuesday, July 30 @ 12:25:51 EDT (16943 reads)

Anonymous writes "I used to work in a high end plumbing showroom. I would assist clients with selections for new home builds or remodeling projects.I have been a designer/showroom consultant for 15 years so believe me, I have seen it all! 
My first story took place when I was fairly new to the industry. I had an older gentleman come into the showroom. He was inquiring on the water depth in a toilet. He began to explain to me that he need a toilet with very low water. He began to explain to me that he has an issue with his current toilet holding a lot water in the bowl. He is specifically looking for one with low water so his testicles or balls as he stated wouldn't touch the water. I said, "uhhh....I am not sure what the water height is but I could call the manufacturer and see if they have the answer". I go to call and he begins to sit on every toilet to see where his "balls"would hit in the bowl!

(Read More... | 2121 bytes more | 277 comments | Score: 4)

No public bathroom? No problem!
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Thursday, July 25 @ 11:00:15 EDT (21097 reads)

Anonymous writes "I work in a chain dollar store in a bad part of town. My job includes throwing out prostitutes and thieves, gang bangers, etc. Middle aged overweight frizzy haired lady came in and asked for the bathroom. I'll call her Miss Frizzle. By law, we do not have to provide a public restroom. Sometimes we are being nice and will let little kids pr pregnant ladies go- but we have to take them. Miss Frizzle wasn't happy and was holding her large stomach in to keep from peeing on herself. She walks outside and stops approximately 6 feet from our front door, pulls down her shorts & underwear and proceeds to pee a river of urine into the parking lot. Seemed like she peed for 5 minutes straight. All the employees and customers were watching her and gagging. My weak stomached coworker starts heaving into his trash can. Wimp! Miss Frizzle comes back into the store after drip drying and goes to the feminine hygiene section. She picks out a $2 douche- Summer Fresh or something like that- and brings it to the counter. I do not even want to touch the product so I use a plastic bag to turn it over to scan the barcode. Guess what? her debit card declines, she doesn't even have $2.13 to pay for her douche to clean up her nasty self. Gross. It's about 90 degrees Fahrenheit outside and she smells of cigarettes, urine, and just plain filth. She's got no money so she leaves. So effing disgusting. I had to put the douche back on the shelf to sell. Immediately after that, I went and scrubbed my hands and arms to rid myself of her germs and memory."

(Read More... | 378 comments | Score: 0)

Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Tuesday, July 16 @ 14:11:08 EDT (16774 reads)

seafoam writes "Today was my last day at my job in a department store. I hope never to work retail again...I started when I was 16, it was my first job. Now I'm 18; I was there a year and eight months. I know compared to a lot of you guys on the site, that's not a long time at all, but it felt like forever to me. Now that I'm done, I finally feel free to write on here.

At first I was just glad to have a job and be paid, but the longer I stayed and the more I became aware that the only one who'll pay for my college is me, I began feeling increasingly trapped. To say the store is badly organized is kind; it's not organized at all.

I have so many stories from my time there, but for now here's some of my biggest pet peeves.

(Read More... | 3744 bytes more | 246 comments | Score: 4.3)

15 Year Retail Clerk Breaking Down
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Wednesday, June 05 @ 17:33:57 EDT (54604 reads)

Anonymous writes "I live in St.Louis, Mo and I must say I am happy to be part of a blog that will let you get whatever you need to off your chest about the "wacky world of retail".  I will not tell you where I work but I will say that I have sympathy for you all who are just frustrated and fed up with companies, policies and most of all customers.  I am currently working on a book that is for people who have never worked a day in their life or have never worked retail and they all think they understand and they don't. Chapters will be on coupons, how to treat employees with respect and kindness and to not throw things at us (such as money, credit cards, reward cards etc) when we are doing our job by asking, "how are you doing today?"

(Read More... | 7619 bytes more | 506 comments | Score: 5)

Truck stop hell!!
Posted by AlucardCorporate Sucks on Wednesday, May 15 @ 10:03:12 EDT (16779 reads)

Anonymous writes "I worked in a well known corporate owned large truck stop retail chain and it sucked so bad, I can remember the frustration that I would feel towards people...examples..

1. We have like 20 something odd pumps in the front lot, we are usually really busy and if you dont look at your pump number, prepay for gas, someone can just pump your gas cuz you were too damn lazy. One night there is a guy and unfortunately the glass window is beind us pointing towards the pumps, he was like "I want 5$ white car out there"  "Sir, I need a pump number there are like 3 white cars out there"  " white pump 6."   "sir, are you sure? You wouldnt want to set it for the wrong pump and someone else pump your gas"  "yea im sure, give me my gas"  I set it up and we get busy and it is only 2 people checking out like 20 customers. Usually I can catch the stupid customers misteaks but not in this particular instance. He comes storming in and says that he did not get his gas, the pump is not working and it is not my fault. I ask "which pump is it?" "Six, I am on six." I look at my POS and there is nothing on pump six anymore. "Sir, It says that the gas was already pumped."  "Nah man I aint pump no gas, im on pump six"  I hold my breath and look out the window....squint through the glare of the lights on the window from within the store and to my horror, he is not on pump six, I turn to look at him and in front of the entire store let loose my anger "YOU MEAN PUMP 5!! YOU ARE ON PUMP 5, I TOLD YOU THAT THIS COULD HAPPEN IF YOU DID NOT TAKE A MINUTE TO LOOK AT THE CORRECT PUMP AND YOU GAVE ME A GUESS!!!" He looks at me at a loss of word or what to do because he knows he was wrong and lazy, the manager is the only other person working the registers and she has even stopped to look at me, at a loss for what to say...All I could do was say "go...go pump your dam gas and my fucking register will be short 5$ I guess Ill just get in trouble because you didnt want to step outside and check your pump...whatever, just go!"

(Read More... | 5008 bytes more | 345 comments | Score: 4.2)

On the Grind -- A Service Industry Comic Strip
Posted by AlucardCustomers Suck on Tuesday, April 30 @ 15:55:19 EDT (27263 reads)

geogant writes "It's not really a single story, but I've worked in the service industry for over ten years, mostly in coffee shops. I've dealt with crazy customers, crazy co-workers and management, BS schedules, 4:45am openings, and well, everything. My experiences led me to create a comic strip a few years ago about the service industry. It's called On the Grind, and I wanted to share it with you today. It's comedic, and a lot of it is based on true stories. 

I also have a book based on the comic, called The Worst Day Ever:

Anyways, I hope you check out the comic, and read my stories about the craziness that happens behind the counters of your favorite coffee shop.


(Read More... | 544 comments | Score: 5)

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